You know how boys say things like “dem collect my babe with iPhone 14”, “dem collect my babe with Range Rover?” 

In my case, dem collect my babe with Crypto classes o 😢! 

But make I no lie, I get small fault. 

Let me explain. 

So, Doris had been talking about us taking a Crypto trading class together for months. 

She’d always been interested in NFTs and Crypto, and she felt that since I lost my job in January, we could find a class together 👀. 

But me?

I just wanted to relax jare. I wasn’t broke yet, I lived with my parents and I loved my free time. 

I followed Doris for the first class, and I met Dimeji – the Crypto trading tutor I blame for losing my woman 🌚. 

I got so bored I left the class midway — Doris was upset. 

Did I let that bother me? Nope. 

She’d be fine, I told myself. 

Soon, Doris started to actively trade as she continued with her classes, and my babe was making proper money o 🤑. 

This woman was constantly spoiling me with goodies and I was feeling like somebody with sugar mummy!

But Doris never stopped nagging about how I needed to find something to learn, but I would always make an excuse and change the topic. 

She started spending more time at her classes. She was also complaining about my laziness less, but I didn’t even notice 🙃. 

At least, not until my guy’s brother who was taking the same Crypto class told me how Doris and Dimeji had become inseparable. 

Abi should I join the class again ni? 

Even though I literally did nothing with my time, I just couldn’t give away hours of my day. 

“I’d question that woman later tonight.” I thought 🧐.

That never happened, because an hour later, Doris texted; “I need a break. I don’t want to keep nagging you, so this is best. Go figure out what you want to do with your life, then come find me.”

Hard guy cried like a baby o.  

But that wasn’t the weird part. 

You know how heartbreak dey motivate some people? It happened to me o 😬. 

It’s been two months since then, and I’ve become a self-taught Crypto trader who hit my first big profit two weeks ago. 

Converting my crypto to cash has been the easiest thing! 

I was stalking Doris on Twitter when I saw she retweeted a post from an account called Breet. 

“I can trade my coins for cash in minutes? Impossible!” I thought 🤥. 

I signed up, and e shock me  – I had my $500 BTC in my Naira account within 5 minutes!

Lesson learnt o, lesson learnt. 

But who go help me beg this babe like this, ehn 😩? 

 

Writer | Creative | A little obsessed with spinning stories.